My "exile from sports" still continues. Though no one really noticed or missed me except one teammate.
With all the work issues and personal problems I have, playing was the one thing that helped me forget about it all, even for a while. Doing what I do on the courts, will help de-stress and keep my sanity in check. It was the one thing I know where I can be awesome and help me feel good about myself.
But lately, I guess everything is taking its toll on me. I no longer have the same swagger and mojo to play. I'm not even confident in my own game. With this loss of confidence, I have bad and lousy games, which I can't take. Playing was the one thing that can help me be awesome, but if I keep having bad games, what am I?
With all this said, I find myself no longer having fun playing. Which is really the point of playing - having fun. But now that I'm no longer having fun, I guess I should just walk away or stay away.
The Mrs says I'm in my head too much. I think too much. But that's what I am. I have 'high' standards to my play. I want to entertain, I want to keep the game sexy. But now I can't seem to do anything right.
How long will I be out? I have no idea. I need to find that spark that ignites my interest in playing again.
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