The one with the anger and hate in me

I believe a lot of you are wondering why so much anger and hate. As philosopher Lennon once said "make love, not war". And how a nice quiet guy like me has so much hate. Then again, I believe that's the case. I keep everything inside, and I'm practically a walking time bomb and will blow up anytime soon.
Maybe I should explain where all this negative (or positive) energy is coming from. As of late work really, really sucks. Been getting a lot of crap as well as more shit from people. Previously I try to remain calm and take it as a lesson. But now I believe its beyond that. I'm being made the scapegoat of everything. And slowly, I have a really short fuse. I am probably thisclose to snapping or worse, killing someone.
If you want me to explain all in chronological order, it would be one hell of a story which no one would be interested to read. Lets just say I've reach the point where I should actively explore other job opportunities. Besides, I believe I've worn out my welcome and not a lot of people like me. Guess I've achieved that in almost one year with Am. Guess the fact that "you give a little love and it all comes back to you" doesn't apply here.
Bit why all the anger and hate. I hate being made the scapegoat. I hate being called out for something I didn't do or in one particular case being wrongly advise on what to do. I hate people who take their own sweet time to submit their report resulting me to compile and submit the report way past the due date. I hate being blamed for everything, even for deals which are not mine. I hate the business banking unit. I hate the loans department. I hate the operations department. I hate being 'controlled' in karaoke. And the list goes on, some you might think silly.
As I mention earlier, I'm thisclose to snapping. And when that happens, cry havoc and let slip the dogs of war. And I'll bury anyone who gets in my way. Remember people, don't wound what you can't kill.

The one with the lazy Sunday

The day which I prefer to do nothing but sleep. After a long torturous week, its nice to finally chill and do nothing productive. After the week I had and the week I'm going to face (which I know its going to be nuts) I need to recharge.
Spent most of the day online, sleeping and reading. Its nice to finally be able to catch up on some reading with a clear mind. Also spent most of the day on youtube. Manage to catch the new trailers for the upcoming movies. Finally the cool movies are coming.
First of all, the entourage will go and catch Ironman. Should probably get the summer movies rolling. Followed by Indy 4 and Wanted. And I know it won't be out till July, but The Dark Knight will cap it all off. Most of all, really excited about The Dark Knight.
What else did I do? Nothing else. Just total relaxation. Even though I fear for tomorrow.
The fact that today has been a lazy Sunday, I'm too lazy to even blog.

The one with 3-straight futsal nights

As the title suggests, I've been on the futsal courts these past few nights than by the time I reach home its time for my beauty sleep. I believe thats the first time I played 3 straight nights from Tuesday to Thursday. Not sure if it was a good thing that futsal Friday has been shutdown due to insufficient numbers. If there was, I believe I would have played 5 straight days as my Saturday group is ready to go.
Have to say it was well needed. Helps forgets issues plaguing me. The fact that I've been in entertaining mode since last Saturday's session really helps. The fact that one can add flavour to the game and make it entertaining is pleasing. Sometimes it not scoring or winning that counts. Its the fluid sexy-futsal movements that makes the goal more worth it. It may still count as one goal, but like they say in basketball, the hardest trick is putting the ball in the basket.
Sometimes I wonder why I can't translate my happy energetic futsal performances in real life. Its like after the game is over, life sucks again.

The one where I need to kill someone to show people I mean business

My apologies for the 18SG title. But that is currently what I'm thinking at the moment. I feel I need to get rid of the good-boy-nice-guy image. Feels like society is taking advantage on the fact I'm the nice guy. As noble as the behavior is I feel its not really doing me any justice.
The only way to do that, is to do something unthinkable. Something no one expects me to do (and no, displaying out-of-this-world-futsal-skils doesn't count). There's where I figure by killing someone should do the trick. Question now is who?
At times I feel that fact that I care about the people around me as well as high accountability is probably my greatest weakness. They both apply in both my work life and private life. And as most people close to me would realize is that no matter how much people beat me down or betray me or more words I can't think of here, I'm still around. I try to BE NICE, avoid making things bigger than they are.
As an article in Off The Edge said, this is not healthy. I should stop being nice and stop giving a rats ass. Show the James Bond attitude from Casino Royale when asked if he wanted his vodka martini shaken or stirred by saying "Do I look like I give a damn?".
Sadly its not easy to change who you are, isn't it.

Wicker Park - Final Scene

The one where Jalan Raja Chulan became Sungai Raja Chulan

I believe the weather we're experiencing is due to global warming. I can be scorching hot one minute and raining cats and dogs and monkeys for that matter the next. Anyways, we have been experiencing heavy rain these past few days. As a result, massive jams and flash floods in the city.
Well, there was a sight in front of my building. And sorry to say I did not take pictures. Reasons why I can't be a photographer. I never seem to capture the moment. So there it was, the road in front of my building became a river. A very Malaysian river due to the muddy colours. Some cars attempted to drive through the water only to get stuck in the middle. And some colleagues who's car were park in the basement rushed to see if their wheels were OK.
I believe this will be a familiar sight as long as these heavy downpours keep pouring. So I guess we can start doing our part by helping reduce the effects of global warming.
On another note, my futsal performance took a massive hit. My once-reliable first touch has deserted me. I can't seem to control the ball these past few games. And my passing precision is totally off. It seems that all aspects of my game has suffered. Even my off-the-ball movement is more statue-esque these days.
Final note, congratulations to Choo on the birth of your daughter.

The one with Definitely, Maybe

Well I believe this post was suppose to come prior to the karaoke post. Then again, just like the movie, I'll work my way backwards. By the way, I watched the movie twice.
First of all its not your typical romantic comedy. Its not the typical boy meets girl flick. Still it does have a happy ending. Its more of a 'whodunnit' film, where the main character tells his daughter on how he met the mum. And the daughter has to figure out which one of the three ladies in his life is the mum. By the way the parents are going through a divorce, and the daughter wants to help her father find happiness.
A very lovely film if you ask me. Explains why I watched it twice. As for the connection and whether it relates to me in real life, I have no idea. The movie kind of tells the story that the right one has always been in front of you, except you just don't see it until its too late.
Another short post, guess I'm keeping it short and simple these days.

The one with the karaoke versatility

Finally had our long overdue karaoke session. It seems like some time since the entourage last rocked the scene. Nevertheless the session was well needed. Even though not everyone was able to attend, but the usual mainstays were there.
I believe last nights session was a display of our versatility. We manage to pull off a variety of music genres. We went opera by singing Phantom of the Opera. We also went hip hop and rap by rapping to Crank That by Soulja Boy. Also had a boy band medley (Backstreet Boys), rock medley (Bon Jovi) which nearly killed our voices and also a R&B medley (Boyz to Men). Its amazing that the group can pull off all genres of music. The only thing now is that we lack an identity. Guess you can say we can sing anything for any occasion.
Also did my rendition of Lionel Ritchie's Hello, David Cook style.
And for the last song of the night, we went Estranged by singing Itu Kamu.

Kekasih Gelapku by Ungu

The one with the treasure hunt

An eventful weekend. I entered the AmBank Group Treasure Hunt. The hunt was from KL to Penang. Actually we finish before Penang, but we stayed overnight there. My team included colleagues from my department Chun Bee, Melissa and Cythia (yes it is spelt without the 'N'). So I was the driver, Chun Bee the navigator and the two girls were the brains of the operation.
A very early morning for all of us. Woke up at 5am, met up with the team around 6ish at the Securities Commission carpark. We flagged off around 7.30 (after a delay due to typical Malaysian timing). The hunt theme was based on the PIrates trilogy. I didn't manage to watch all three films before the hunt so I printed out the wikipedia of the films. My team were all first timers. So generally we weren't use to all the puzzles. We all had a good grasp on the general knowledge, but we had trouble deciphering the clues and hints within the given clues. But its an experience for all of us for the next hunt (providing we are all still in the bank next year). And also the discovery of the fact that RED is totally NOT my colours.
We reached the finishing station at 3.15pm and after submitting our answers and treasures we headed off the the island. I was surprised to see a lot has changed since the last time I was in Penang (2002). I myself spent two ill-fated years at a boarding school in Penang and it seems all the shortcuts and routes I use to know were non-existent. Anyways, before we headed to the Bayview Hotel in Batu Feringhi, we headed to Gurney Drive for some good (overpriced) Penang food. When we finally reached the hotel we wanted to head to the beach for some sea fun. But from our balcony we saw a huge drain heading to the sea next to the hotel. Crap-O. We then changed our minds and headed to the pool. After swimming a couple of laps I realize I seriously need to lose pounds as I couldn't pull of the James Bond scene.
Later that night was the answers and prize giving ceremony. We manage to get 10 out of 30 questions right. And two of my teammates (Chun Bee and Cythia) won toasters from the lucky draw.
Sadly, the event went low-key. It was announced that one car didn't make the finish line and one bank staff died in the accident. A burst tyre, car spinning out of control and a collision with the divider were the events leading to the death.
We still went out for drinks later that night. Went to the QEII, some club at the jetty, supposedly one of the happening places in Penang. The only good thing about the place was the fact that it was on the jetty. The rest was okay except the music which totally sucked.
We slept after 2am, after my roommate was puking his guts out.
Woke up the next morning and headed to the balcony. A beautiful rainbow greeted me good morning. Headed for breakfast after taking a shower. After breakfast I was walking around the hotel and found a basketball court. I went nuts after that and borrowed a ball from the hotel. Shot some hoops and realize I really miss playing basketball. At least I still had my moves and somehow managed some lay ups (I can't dunk anymore due the the weight I'm carrying around) with my off-hand.
After checking out, we headed to Georgetown for some nasi kandar before heading back home. It was raining the whole trip back and after the news of the accident, the girls told me to driver slower. We reached KL around 4.30pm and after sending everyone off I headed home to sleep.
Still tired, but had a great time.